My Childhood Home

I was thinking recently about the love I have for the house I grew up in. We moved when I was 14, and I do not feel nostalgic for my second home in the way that I do for my first home. Maybe it was the fact that "Roney 1975" was etched into the garage floor because my parent's built the house, maybe it was the fact that my room was MY ROOM. In our second house, I never really felt settled and my room never really felt like mine, but in the first house, it was MINE. My green carpet and flowered wallpaper and room shaped like a gun, it was all mine. My memories of that house are so vivid, sometimes I'll drive past and I'll get a feeling like I could turn up the driveway, walk right in and still feel at home.

Maybe this is on my mind because for Christmas this year Megan got as a gift my old doll house. It has been passed around to lots of different kids over the years, but now it's back, and even though it is red when it should be yellow, I still look at it and want to sit and play it with her for hours. Sometimes she wakes up early, turns on her light and plays with it for an hour before coming into our room to get us up for the day.

It could also be because I am in the process of signing her up for preschool and she will go to the same school that I did. We went and visited last week, and it looks just the same. My old teacher is still there, believe it or not. She seemed so grown up. She introduced herself to some of the other kids, and even started a game of tag. It's as though a whole new world is opening up for her.

I love that she is getting old enough to do those things, but it also makes me yearn for the home that she and Jack will grow up in. Where we live now feels temporary, but Megan is forming memories and attachments to our house and neighborhood. It makes me happy to see her connect to the things around us, but I also want her to have a home with a backyard and friends who live next door or down the street who she'll grow up with. If only we could bring our current neighbors with us when we go.